Written By Wesley
Like so many others, I have had a Facebook page for many years. Almost nine years to be exact. At first it was to keep in touch with friends and family that lived so far away. It was nice because I can see what they were all up to and vice versa. However, things started to change some.
What was supposed to be just a simple way to keep in touch with people became so much more complex than that. I started to sign up to groups and I was “liking” pages that I found interesting. That’s when things were starting to deviate from my original purpose to be on Facebook. It was becoming so much more.
I started to post a lot of things. I was trying my best to keep up with everything. At the time however, I thought it was cool. I had the ability to look up what’s happening around the world. To read what were the newest trends and happenings. I noticed it was getting bigger and bigger.
My wall was expanding to the point that I really couldn’t go back or truly keep up. I had over 100 friends. I had well over 1000 liked pages. Some pages I realized I forgot all about and some died off because maybe they were pages about movies or tv shows. Things that don’t really have anymore updates. They were mainly kept up by those leaving page comments and discussions. I was also part of well over 30 groups. Probably double that amount now. Some groups were prpbably groups that I had no real intention to keep up with. Only because I was, at one time, interested in those groups. It was just getting harder.
It was becoming almost impossible to keep track with the ins and outs of pages and groups. My private page had become it’s own proverbial breathing living monster. For me, it became a monster that couldn’t be tamed anymore. A page that at one time was supposed to be for something else had completely changed over the next few years. For me it wasn’t getting any better.
Just like a drug. Facebook had officially became an addiction. So much information so much out there and yet I wasn’t quite happy with it anymore. It really started to suck my life like a drug. You know how some of us get out of bed and we may have that first cup of coffee. Some may have that first smoke or maybe you’re a caffeine fiend and you need that Coke, Mountain Dew or maybe Starbucks because a regular cup of joe from home just couldn’t seem to cut it. Well for me it was none of those. None of those did it. I didn’t do any of that. However, I did do something else.
I couldn’t go with out looking at Facebook. First thing I did in the morning was get on Facebook. While I know for certain I am not alone but the first thing I do is jump on facebook. At first it was more than anything to see what was going on around the world. But it became less than that. It became more like I had to.
It got so bad that it wasn’t really about seeing the news or seeing what my friends and family were up to. It was about the idea that I had to get on facebook first thing in the morning. I had to get that fix. Well it got worse from there.
My addiction to Facebook became so much more. I had to get on. Again, not because I had to see what was going on. It was much less than that. I really didn’t give a crap really anymore about the going ons in the world. I had to turn it on. I had to open the app and see it there. See the Facebook logo. I just aimlessly scrolled through my wall.
Sure when I did that there were some stories that caught my eye but over all I really didn’t care. It’s not like I was interacting with friends or family. I rarely interacted with the groups I was in. It was about one thing and one thing only. The fact that I got on.
I, Wesley, have an addiction to Facebook. That had to be the hardest realization in my life. I never thought something like this could get anyone addicted to. The addiction for me got worse. I’d actually sneek off for a few minutes here or there just to get my Facebook fix.
Instead of maybe taking a 10 minute walk or reading a few pages from a book I was reading. Taking maybe a few minutes and write notes for the book I wanted to write or spending those 10 minutes and visiting with my fiance who I love and a son I am grateful to have. Instead of doing any or all of these things. I would instead get on Facebook. To me that was more important.
Don’t get me wrong. Facebook is a tool that can do a lot of awesome things for a person, group or company. It can help businesses grow. It can be an amazing tool to advertise on and spread the word about say the newest book release or the newest cd or video game. Facebook does help in a lot of ways. For just the average person though. It’s nothing more than a time waster.
For the average user it isn’t anything more than just to keep tabs with what’s happening in the world. However, It can be an addiction. An addiction like any other will suck you in. So. I have made some big choices.
I have decided to at least deactivate my facebook. I have decided that Facebook will not have a hold on me anymore. It’s something I will not let keep a hold of me. I want to make my life my own again without worrying about getting on Facebook.
This is an addiction I will break and I just don’t know when or if I will ever reactivate my account. I just don’t want this addiction anymore. I will have to learn how to control myself. That is a lesson that will take some time to teach myself. It’s something I don’t need or want anymore.